Am I supposed to laugh or cry?

Laugh?: Wednesday morning I put on a pair of jeans and found $26 dollars in the front pocket! No idea why. I could not figure out when I wore them last, or why that much cash was there. (This may also be a comment on how efficiently I do laundry.) I took that windfall as a sign that it was going to be a good day.

Cry?: Friday morning I woke up to some cat spit and grass bits in the hallway. Somebody couldn’t handle their fresh pot of greens, but a little cat spit is easy enough to deal with at 5:45 a.m.

Cat spit is one thing, a poo on the kitchen rug is another. I had to stare at it a really long time because it was the perfect shape of a really dense hairball. A hairball would make sense in combination with cat spit and grass bits, but something wasn’t quite right. It was poo.

While cleaning that up, I discovered that I had narrowly missed stepping on two tiny poos at the kitchen entrance. I understand the random dingle-berry that gets stuck to someone’s furry haunches, but the poo of intent raises too many questions. Who pooed in the first place?! Is someone sick? Is someone angry? Was the bathroom full and the poo couldn’t wait? Did the rug need dominated? I DON’T KNOW! People at work said this is why you’re only supposed to have ONE cat; it eliminates doubt.

Poos resolved, I proceeded with my morning routine: fed everyone, took a shower, got partially dressed, finished most of a cup of coffee, stumbled back to the kitchen to put coffee in thermos.

Vomit.

The previously pooed on rug was now smeared with vomit while a second pile dripped on the cat tree. I gave up on the rug and threw in the washing machine; too many bodily fluids to just wipe up before a school day.

I wish I could say that this is where it all ended, but that afternoon I came home to ants trailing across the kitchen to the front door. Much like one of the cats, I then lost my shit.

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Cry rainbows, drink wine.

 

 

Paths

I mowed for the first time this spring a couple of weeks ago. Presumably it was time to mow since the curb grass that the city planted when they repaved the road was edging towards a foot tall, the neighbor to the right had given his lawn a crew cut primarily so he could use his leaf blower WHENEVER POSSIBLE, and my much saner neighbor on the left had mowed at a reasonable length.

As I came around the side of the house to edge along the fence, I discovered well worn paths in the grass. We had an incredibly mild winter so the grass was rarely buried in snow and the critter population must have kept moving throughout the season. One path hugged the flower bed by the house and scooted under the gate. Two other paths came from different angles through the sane neighbor’s yard to converge at a point under the fence.

Given the warming spring weather and the full moon, I decided to put the game camera out, two days and nights on each path, to see who was wearing away the grass.

Unfortunately, I need to play with the camera settings or maybe invest in a new SD card because my night photos are whiting out and my day time photos have taken on a strange pinkish tint. From the night photos, I was able to discern a cat ear, some skunk stripes and maybe a opossum.

The day time photos featured some random birds landing in the right spot and plenty of squirrel action including my favorite.  I love this majestic beast stalking through the grass for a close up. WGI_0047

Last Night…no pets here

Last night before I went to bed, I did a head check and found Miles and Sookie all snorgled in presumably celebrating National Pet Day with some kisses. Even though Miles, tried to signal that I should just leave already (Note the owl ears),…IMG_7125

….I just had to be me and make things awkward.

“AAAAAAHHHHHH Happy Pet Day you guys!” Lisped directly through my sexy night guard.IMG_7127.