Tales of the World’s Longest Yard Sale, Day 2, Year 3: I Don’t Like It.

Day 2, we returned to Sherwood, Ohio exactly where we had left off the evening before. (Yes, I know that I left off this train of thought months ago with Day 1. I don’t know. I’m easily distracted? I had a legit plan.)

MomBert scored some old frames and a cast iron toy stove off some vendors in a packed lot. That’s how you consolidate your junk, people! Line your tiny town streets, but utilize those empty lots!

9 a.m., Day 2

9 a.m., Day 2 somewhere in a parking lot.

Day 2 brought more of the same as Day 1: long, straight, flat stretches of roads, and individual sales.

We did hit a great pocket of vendors and junk where I bought some sewing machine legs for $40. Some research, based on their unique patterns,  showed that they were from the Free Sewing Machine Company. These would eventually become the legs of my new desk which is a whole other story.

Sewing machine legs and MomBert's "throwing star." She's a ninja.

Sewing machine legs and MomBert’s “throwing star.” She’s a ninja.

On down the road in Cecil, Ohio, after surveying another interesting collection of junk and what-nots in a defunct gas station parking lot, we determined that it was lunch time and that we should eat at the restaurant adjacent to the parking lot instead of trying to subsist on car snacks again.

We were so proud of our “eating local” streak. The Vagabond Village was a typical wood-paneled example of a rural area truck stop. Lots of space, plenty of Formica, and you shouldn’t  piss off whoever’s grandma was waiting on you. Lunch was better than car snacks, but I sensed that it was a spot where the greasy diner breakfast would be magnificent.

We were wild and both got hamburgers. MomBert though wanted to make some substitutions, not a good plan. The side of the day that specifically went with the Hawaiian burger was coconut pineapple bites. I think we both envisioned a side dish from school cafeteria days: basically a bowl of pineapple chunks with coconut mixed in. She did not want the Hawaiian burger, but she did want something that would not be fried and add to stomach upset. Pineapple with coconut seemed to make sense.

Explaining this to our waitress was an exercise in circular discussions with several trips to the kitchen to check on whether or not this was okay. However at no point was a description of the coconut bites given nor did MomBert point out that she wanted a non-fried side. After much exasperation- we pissed off the grandma– negotiations were completed and MomBert would get what she asked for.

But as The Rolling Stones say, “You can’t always get what you want…”

But this was not what she needs.

But this was not what she needs.

The perfect face of :”I don’t like it.”

Only small, picky children and the severely disappointed can respond to food this way. Someone in the kitchen had gotten creative to entice the local palettes with the exotic taste of Hawaii in Ohio: deep fried, coconut covered pineapple. Oh, it was sad. They didn’t even come with a special dipping sauce.

I advised MomBert to “be cool, man”. She had fought our server over getting this specific side dish and here it was. We just needed to get out full and alive.

I helped her eat some of the bites and we attempted to hide others under used napkins. The burgers were ok, and we managed to escape without grandmotherly retribution.

The rest of the day was flat and uneventful. We saw wind turbines around Haviland, Ohio.


And “cool crap” around Center, Ohio

The sign was partially accurate.

The sign was partially accurate.

The goats were way cooler though.


We discovered what G.I.Joe did with his retirement. He’s a lobster man.

Having the right sweater is half the battle

Having the right sweater is half the battle.

We were rejuvenated by Celina, Ohio  late in the day as hunger and exhaustion was creeping back in. There was a large set up on the shore of Grand Lake-St Mary’s State Park. I found some Czech birds, they had a bathroom, the lake was pretty. All was well.

Yard saling is all about the sex appeal.

Yard saling is all about the sex appeal.

Our last stop around 6 p.m. was closing up shop, but their giant chicken was going no where.

Smells like chicken.

Smells like chicken.

We ended the day in Greenville, Ohio, noting a couple of spots that we would back track to in the morning. We debated a side trip to Annie Oakley’s grave site, but were too tired to truly consider going off the trail. For some reason, I had no idea that Oakley was from Ohio even though I remember reading children’s books about her, and that we were in her general area in Darke County. Another adventure for another day.

The last adventure for this day was dinner. We headed for Mexican at El Camino Real which was recommended by Yelp and  the questionable clerk at our 2-story Comfort Inn with no elevator. Don’t worry, they’re thinking about adding one.

Dinner made up for the pineapple bite fiasco of lunch. It was a giant Mexican restaurant that might have once been some kind of buffet with the expected 5 million meal options on the expansive laminated menu.

We were happy. The MomBert was happy. She even convinced them to make coffee for her. It took forever, but coffee was brewed.

Mexican restaurants don't serve coffee?

Mexican restaurants don’t serve coffee?

Day 3 would bring a breakfast discovery and backtracking.


7 thoughts on “Tales of the World’s Longest Yard Sale, Day 2, Year 3: I Don’t Like It.

    • They definitely needed something to dip them in. I couldn’t decide if it needed to be sweet or spicy. This is what happens when the Ohio State Fair is known for experimenting with deep fried anything.


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