Kitten Therapy 

The Kitten Room at the shelter is not much bigger than my bathroom; but like the Tardis, the Kitten Room’s power is way bigger on the inside.

In the Kitten Room I am a benevolent tree, an Ent if you will, being climbed by a horde of tiny, squirming creatures, all vying for cuddles. One rooted leg is assailed by a miniature black panther who gives up around my knee. The other leg supports a tiger who may have hit the weight limit for climbing jeans, as his needle-sharp claws dig deep into my hip. Meanwhile a tinier, wiggly tiger is running laps around my neck and periodically sticking his nose in my ear to demonstrate purr potential.

While the slightly larger tiger makes sleepy eyes at me from the crook of my arm, tinier tiger keeps zooming. He stops once in each lap to settle on the convenient shelf my chest makes and nose boop the calmer tiger. Then back to zooming.

Whenever I manage to sit down or bend over, a black and white, cow-spotted kitten gives me “soft pets,”patting at my face with insistent paws. This tears me up a bit as it immediately reminds me of Bella Luna’s possessive paw to my cheek when we first met at her shelter. Cow kitten then hangs out on the elevated foot of my crossed leg.

Forty-five minutes later, I’m covered in strange cat hair and strange smells. I will have to leave my shoes and clothes in the garage when I get home. Windowless, attached garages are essential for extended shelter cat petting. My cats will know I’ve been cheating on them with younger, more enthusiastic versions of themselves. 

Forgiven.

Since I didn’t fall madly in love and bring home a fifth,- this is the miracle of the day– they’ll forgive me.

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Solar Kitten

Super-heated sunbeams have solar powered my boy. I found him up and enthusiastically trying to kill an already dead spider plant leaf. When I picked it up, he took a swipe at it with his giant panther paws. (He also tries this technique when I’m holding the food scoop.) The sunlight brought out his inner kitten.

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This one is my favorite. I love the double-pawed, almost cross-eyed enthusiasm. He needs his nails trimmed. I texted the photo to MomBert and she responded with “Is that Miles????” When I asked who else would it be, she said, “Looks like a kitten.”

(There’s always that strong-ish possibility that I will adopt a mini-me for Miles. I think he would be a great kitten mommy. However MomBert was probably gearing up to yell at me via text message if it was a kitten…other than Miles who is totally “The Baby.”)

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He’s packed in enough enthusiasm for the day and is back to a more realistic level of exuberance, “helping” me at the computer.

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If your Sunday needs additional cat pictures, check out the Cat Welfare calendar contest currently in action. This is Miles and Bella Luna’s former shelter. They do the yearly calendar as a fundraiser.

Belated Pumpkins

This is one of those post ideas that got away from me and is no longer really timely, but who’s keeping track!

I took my pumpkin carving skills on the road this year to MomBert’s house. I showed up with four bargain basement pumpkins since it was Halloween weekend, and eight cupcakes from my favorite cupcakery. We proceeded to murder both!

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PolkaDot Cupcakery is amazing. I feel like I personally keep them in business. That’s probably not a good thing.

However, MomBert insisted on bathing the pumpkins first. For a clean artistic palette, of course. I watched her do this with one of her two pumpkins, a particularly  stem-heavy one, as she rambled on about just exactly how she should incorporate the large stem into her design. I waited until she had a good grip on the stem and I had my camera ready, then simply suggested, “penis?”

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Pumpkin dick jokes never get old.

We camped out out on a tarp to carve as her kittens careened around the room because “OMG, huge orange things from outside!” and “Clearly this plastic thing is for tunneling!”

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Watching cheesy Halloween movies and taking cupcake bite breaks, we successfully worked our way through two pumpkins each.

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Mine are the squirrel and owl scene; hers are the traditional jack-o-lantern and the dude with a penis for a nose.

The bucket of pumpkin guts were strewn about overnight by the raccoon population, but was easily scooped up and dumped near the woods for others to snack on. We wondered if her deer herd would sample some pumpkin bits.

I am jealous of her wild life. She has a deer who licks the bird feeder and then stares in the window in a stalker-esque, peeping Tom sort of way.

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“Hey, hey, whatcha doin’ there? Are those kittens?”

Another visitor maintains just a tad more dignity when he stops by in the evenings to sample the Fire bush.

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So handsome!

Once returned home, my pumpkins barely made it through the Monday of Halloween and cat photo-shoots, before growing their own ecosystems of mold. Wishing to avoid a repeat of last year’s pumpkin ass-juice episode, I put them in the backyard where they deflated overnight. By the next night, someone with claws and teeth had shredded and tasted the leftovers.

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I’m glad I could contribute to my tiny wildlife population, but they pale in the “cool factor” to some of MomBert’s visitors. This photo she took of a box turtle nomming on pumpkin bits is the real reason that this post needed written, timely or not.

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A perfect Fall palette.

Catzilla! Part 2: Child of Catzilla!

Raised by radioactive raccoons in the deep woods of Southern Ohio, Child of Catzilla (They’re not really related. In fact, they’ve never met.) grew to massive proportions and terrorized local villagers!

ROWR!

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No one was safe! Roads were destroyed!

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Privacy was disrespected.

I see you in there. Rowr!”

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Also showing as matinee features:

Catzilla!Rowr

Cat-Squatch Attacks

Return  of the Cat Clones

 

When Kittens Think of Murder

Pretty sure we caught Tilly in the act of smothering GGK.

“Hey, Tilly, whatcha doin’?”

Find the second kitten.

Perhaps GGK had bitten docile Tilly on the butt one too many times.

GGK:”It was the Dukes. Gahhhhh”

Tilly:”There is nothing to see here. Move along and refill my food bowl. ”


Choke hold.

GGK out!

Meanwhile my idiots are channeling Ross Geller and yelling about their kar-rah-tay and “Unagi, a total state of awareness.”

Hiiiii-ya!

P.S. GGK is fine and was purring the whole time she was being smothered. Whatever floats her kitten boat. 

all good