Autopilot

I managed to change clothes on autopilot as part of my brain was like “Haul ass, fat girl!” I got as far as putting on yoga pants and a sports bra. 
You can’t exercise in Spanx. 
Well, you probably could, but mine were already rolling up the sausages that are my thighs, trying to cut off circulation to my hoo-haw. This does not jive with yoga pants. 

But then the autopilot that was really tired mysteriously landed me on the bed. That part of my brain recommended that I read a few Facebook items, maybe a blog post, and then nod off for a “20 minute nap” that always turns in to like 30 or 40 minutes. 
The cats are taking turns biting my toes that are dangling off the bed, jumping on the bed, and judging me because they are STARVING -they had first scoop only moments ago- and I’m the WORST! I can tell that they are starving from the dents they make every time they walk across my butt. Their sense of judgement makes it heavy. 
Meanwhile another part of my brain says that we can’t nap or exercise or because it’s too busy cataloging the “homework” that needs done tonight so everyone can survive my class tomorrow. And holy shit, it’s 6:00 so there are only about 3 1/2 hours left before everything in me just automatically shuts down like a bad robot. Somewhere in those 3 1/2 hours I need to make dinner, pack my lunch, brush the cats’ teeth, eat dinner, set up the morning coffee, maybe shower, scoop the litter box, pay the bills, and ultimately decide that sleep trumps homework. 
It seems too early in the school year to whine about exhaustion, procrastination, and disorganization, but all I hear is the high pitched, “eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.” It’s probably me. 
At least I’ve advanced to the yoga pants, sports bra AND tshirt stage. 
 

Judgement.

 

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3 thoughts on “Autopilot

  1. Pingback: Flip the Dog | possumscatsthingsgnawingatme

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