One Cat’s Struggle to Stay Classy

Cat vs. Sweater Vest.

Such a well dressed little man.

Such a well dressed little man.

I got a birthday card with a joke about a cat in a sweater. Sure I’ve dressed the kitties up before, what Crazy Cat Lady hasn’t? So it made sense to buy the baby sized sweater vest for .99 cents at the thrift store and bring it home for feline fun to share with the card giver. Fortunately, Miles is a pretty good sport and doesn’t really need to enhance his daily black suit with any vests. Any shame was counteracted by tuna treats later.

 Step 1. Corral cat in smallest room for assembling ensemble.

Step 2. Release cat and await results.

Step 3. Watch as cat transforms into a furry snake. Cats’ “shoulders” were not designed to hold clothing up or in place. Most pieces of cat clothing become tubes to be slithered out of. It’s just a matter of time.

Step 4. Cat calls upon inner demons to become a frenzied blur of clothing defying fur and claws.

Cats don't have shoulders to hold tiny pieces of clothing up.

Cats don’t have shoulders to hold tiny pieces of clothing up.

Step 5. Other cats watch in horror and shame, maybe mockery. I couldn’t really understand what they were saying.

Step 6. Cat escapes clothing, besting all Houdini records until now, walks away as though nothing happened here.

Step 7. We will never speak of this again.

***While at least 3 of 4 cats were disturbed by these events, none were harmed.

Demons! Demons!!

Demons! Demons!!

Sookie the horrified girlfriend:"OMG! What are you wearing?! It's like I don't even know you!"

Sookie the horrified girlfriend:”OMG! What are you wearing?! It’s like I don’t even know you!”

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One thought on “One Cat’s Struggle to Stay Classy

  1. Pingback: Olivia Wigglebothum vs. Halloween | possumscatsthingsgnawingatme

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